Letter to my favorite foster III

Dear Foster,

It’s a new year. YAAYYYYY! We made it! As people were celebrating a new year and previously celebrating Christmas with gifts, family, and food, I stopped to wonder how you were handling these festivities. I imagine these past two weeks have been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster. The anxiety of not knowing if and when you would get to see your mom and siblings.

It’s a heartbreaking sight, watching you make gifts that you believe they would appreciate. You have a unique understanding of what it means to give a gift that comes from the heart. You give what you can, your time and imagination, to create something you feel would bring a smile to your brother’s face. The joy is in your eyes, while the heartbreak aches in my chest as we sit in the office waiting for your mother to show for the visitation. We wait…and wait…and wait. Nothing. I encourage you to make the most of your time that you have with your brother. You go along with it because you feel that you need to stay strong for your younger brother, but the disappointment is in your voice and on your lowered eyebrows.

Yes, I remember these times. The longest embrace could not squeeze out the unfulfilled expectation you had of time with our own family. The firmest hug could not loosen the building resentment around your heart. No, no hug of any kind will immediately take you out of this hurtful moment, but the human touch is healing.

I pray that it was different for you this year. I pray that you had a family whether biological, foster, or volunteers. I pray that someone looked at your Christmas list and made your list a reality. I pray that you experienced happiness.

As this new year begins, resolve to learn the healing of forgiveness. Resolve to work on those “trust issues” that these events exacerbate. Resolve to give yourself credit for the strength you possess.

With all my love,

Ms. Jackson


P.S.- I pray that Christians begin to answer the call of taking care of widows and orphans, including myself. We can get involved in varies ways. We can learn to be a part of the support system for organizations that support foster families.  Yes, working with fosters WILL be tough. You will experience emotions not only for yourself but for the child and their biological family.

Also, the photo is by Annie Spratt on Unsplash.

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